Why Do Republicans Worship Satan?

Obviously, they don't worship Satan. But when I combine my deductive reasoning skills with some of the insane shit I was taught in a fundamentalist Baptist household, I have no choice but to believe there's a conspiracy.

Do you see that shit? Three — count 'em — three inverted stars! Methinks I see a goat's head!

I know I'm by no means the first person to ask about this, but since no one else has ever gotten an answer (the best I can tell), I'll ask it again:

Republicans, what the fuck is up with your iconography?